Errant Son is off again

One of the things I admire about my middle child is his sense of adventure, he has always been fearless and a roaming soul. He is the only one of the children who would go down to the bottom of the garden where all the thick vegetation grows and and he’d play out his little fantasies of discovering new worlds and battling monsters.
When he became unwell and decided to leave medical school, to travel the world my heart stopped, what he can’t travel the world alone, my baby ( my 6″2 baby ) is going to go to strange countries alone, NEVER!
He didn’t let my panic attacks stop him, 3 and a half years he was gone, emails photographs descriptions of the places he’d been and the things he’d seen. I would wake up every morning and open my emails first thing to hear something new from my child. I loved the fact that he was doing something he had always dreamed of, working his way across the world. He picked grapes in a vineyard in Tuscany, worked in a pastry kitchen in Paris, rice paddies in China, taught English in India and Pakistan, worked at a surf school on the Red Sea, did head shots for a fashion house in NYC. Things some people only ever dream of. But it didn’t make me miss him any less, my middle child , my Baby Gray is also my best friend. I’m not usually a clingy over protective mother, but when it comes to him, I am fierce, I know mother’s shouldn’t have favourites and I always say I love all my children the same, but if I am completely and utterly honest Grayson is very special to me for reasons I have mentioned in previous blogs and the idea that he will be gone for 3 months, while not a great length of time, is still too long for me to be without him.
He’s not even been home 10 months, and there is so much I have missed about him I can’t believe that he’s going wandering off again.
I’ve been feeling down these last couple of days and I think it is his impending departure more than anything else,that has me feeling so low.
I didn’t cry when Little Miss went off to university in Johannesburg, but the thought of Errant Son leaving tomorrow has me in tears.


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